Heartbreaking Experience
I threw up three times today, because I was stressing out about Ex #4.
I was so fucking angry. I was blasting Linkin Park and driving down the road at like 80 miles an hour in places that I wouldn’t normally go above 40. It was like a release of rage, and it felt good. I just didn’t give a shit, you know? If I had an accident, then I had an accident. Luckily I didn’t.
I’m so furious at him, I’m so angry, I’m so fucking disgusted. I could really get into why, but it’s 1:30 in the morning and I have to get up at 5:30. So maybe I’ll explain how I’m feeling better tomorrow.
But as far as today, at work, I thought I was going to suffer all day by thinking about him, but luckily a new lady who I was to train came in. She’s a nice lady, probably in her 50’s and she kept me distracted and gave me a lot of love advice, ha.
After work I went the gym with my cousin Steph and my friend Stephanie. Then we went to radio shack and I bought myself a cellphone 
I figured since I had such a shitty week, I deserved to splurge on myself. Made me feel better anyway.
After that we went back to the gym and talked with Ryan, the guy who’s been my personal trainer since I joined. He’s such a sweetheart, he’s really nice and has been training me for free even though he’s not supposed to. He’s about 24, gorgeous, not to mention buff, and seems to really have his shit together. Anyway we all decided to go get some food and see a movie. So we went to Ruby Tuesdays, since that’s where my cousin worked, so we got a discount.
Then we all decided to meet up with Stephanies boyfriend, Kyle, at the theatres since that’s where he worked, and get a movie in for free. We went and saw “Ghost Ship” which is a badass movie, and I really enjoyed it. We also met up with Stephs gay friend…..wait….I forget his name, but he was a riot. So it was basically Ben and Steph, Kyle and Stephanie, me and Ryan, and then the gay friend. Quite the group.
Kyle told me he wanted to take me out and buy me some yo girl clothes, he says I’d look “phat” in a pair of flannel pants and a fleece sweater and my white sneakers. Yeah, like -I- would ever be a yo girl.
I got home about midnight, and I feel so much better, I really do. My friends are so great, because the last guy that cheated on me, they kept me so distracted I didn’t have time to hurt, you know? Eventually I got over and moved on. I love them.
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One Response to “Heartbreaking Experience”
November 15th, 2002 at 4:20 am
I found you from Melissa (dawntreader) I’m.. going through some simaliar issues.
Lovely page.