Imbolc Commitments
Amistad, I just have to say, is one fucking great movie.
The Imbolc ritual today was very relaxing. Cold, but relaxing. We held the ritual outside in the snow, but honestly I could really feel nothing but warmth from the fire of Imbolc. I think a lot of it had to do with the closeness I feel for the druids at Cedar Light Grove. I feel extremelly welcome there. All of the hugs and smiles and welcomes. Sati and I have grown closer as friends too I’d like to think.
I have so many questions in my mind right now. I feel like I have so many decisions to make, like I’m resting in the palm of my hand trying to decide which path to finger out on. I’m starting to realize just what a Turning Point in my life I’m at right now. I’m not quite sure how to go about deciding what is the right path for me to take, and quite frankly it’s kinda scary.
I think I needed that ritual though. I needed that time among pagan friends. It even inspired me to put together a song for next Imbolc that I actually started working out by singing to myself on the drive home.
I was a little shy at the ritual when everyone was stating their commitments for the new season. So I’d like to list them here. First being that I want to change a bit of my lifestyle. Eating healthier, going to the gym regularly, and doing more things around the house. The second is I want to allow myself to heal emotionally. I want all of the emotional damage and stress that I’ve been holding onto, to die away with the winter. I want to start a new path to be happy, to be loved, and to love. I want to stop letting my anger get the best of me and be friends with as many people as I can. I want to cherish the time I have with my sister and my father, knowing that with the death of my Aunt, that I could just as easily lose my father at any moment. I want to find true love.
And it’s about time I started doing things that made me happy, dammit.
Well, I’ve been up since 3am, it is now 1am, and I must be up at 5am. So excuse me whilst I collapse.
Entry viewed times. Posted in Religion and Spirituality
4 Responses to “Imbolc Commitments”
February 9th, 2003 at 6:37 am
Glad to hear it Crys..And good luck with all your descisions
February 10th, 2003 at 12:12 am
Ditto! Yes, sleep is good!
February 10th, 2003 at 3:27 am
you must have been really determined, to have that kind of decision made. it only happened when lots of things fucked up in the past, and you are totally tired of it. and yes, emotionally drained, you need lots of sleep, hun. that’s the begining of the journey =)
February 10th, 2003 at 4:24 am
Feeling closer ot your friends is an amazing thing … I have been lately and it’s something I value greatly - I never want to let it go. Good luck with the songwriting! You have a wonderful voice, it would be nice to hear the song!