Best Camping Weekend Ever/George Bush Resume
Well, got back from the camping trip about 6am this morning, sore, tired, exhausted, but loving every bit of it. I can’t believe I even thought about not going.
It was hot as sin on Friday when we got there. I was pretty miserable all day Friday, as was everyone else. But after the sun set and we all gathered around the campfire, a fellow named Terry and I decided to bring out our drums and guitars and play.
I guess the best way to describe Terry is a free spirit. He’s an inspiring musician who just makes you happy being around him. He lives in this mini-van/camper thing. Basically a mini-van with 2 feet added on to one end with all the essentials of a camper, including a shower. Most of its major appliances are run off propane, he stops once a month or so (I think) for water and to dump at a local trailer place that lets him do it for free, and he parks anywhere he wants discrietly because well, it looks like a van. I was totally amazed when he was telling me about it. No bills except the gas, propane, and a cellphone if he wants one. A post office box handles his mail, he doesn’t have to tend to a lawn, and if he wants he can park inside of a nicely tended park and have his own back yard to relax in. He can go anywhere he wants and still have the comforts of home. I had the chance to take a peek into his home and it was wild.
We played music the entire night and had a lot of fun. He knew mostly some folk/classic rock music, which is perfect for a campfire. His voice was the typical hillbilly twang but it sounded perfect and I had a lot of fun singing and playing along.
Some fire dancers were practicing while we were drumming around the campfire so you could feel the energy of Mars dancing around the fire as well.
Saturday consisted of a lot of relaxing and some rain. Eventually a lot of strange people arrived, some good, some not so good. I wasn’t a big fan of the techno music that was blaring all night Friday and Saturday, I usually come to campouts to relax and get away from that kind of stuff, but what can you do. There were also a lot more kids than we anticipated. A few grew to be quite obnoxious and my tolerance for children was very very low.
Once dusk hit, we all trekked up the hill (fortunately I was in my bronco), to the bonfire and persisted to drum……….a lot. At this point even typing hurts.
Sunday was another day of relaxing, and I was actually rather enjoying myself. We had an awesome sausage gravy and peach cobbler meal, everyone was in fine spirits, even the fire dancers started twirling again (and let me tell you, there was one fire dancer who completely mesmerized me and was very nice to watch). Although I personally got completely annoyed when the group along with two girls decided to get piss drunk, play loud techno while we were trying to drum, and then the girls started grinding and making out with each other to impress the guy. Thankfully they eventually got too hot and heavy so they must have hiked up the hill to give their own offering to each other. Not really something I’d prefer 10 year olds to see but apparently not everyone was in agreement with me.
But after they hid in the woods, Terry and Sati, and Andy and I all sat under her tent and goofed around playing guitar and drums until well after 5am this morning, when I decided to come home.
Although it had it’s low points, and I am extremely exhausted, I had probably the best time this weekend, than I’ve had in quite a while. And I’ve met so many interesting people and exchanged e-mails, when I left this morning I felt like I left a piece of myself behind, but I took and even bigger part of myself with me.
Also wanted to share this:
No offense to George Bush fans, but I had to post this. His Resume.
George W. Bush
The White House, USA
Past Work Experience
I ran for U.S. Congress and lost.
I produced a Hollywood slasher B movie.
I bought an oil company, but couldn’t find any oil in Texas; the company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money.
With my father’s help and name, I was elected Governor of Texas.
Accomplishments as Governor
I changed pollution laws in favor of the power and oil companies and made Texas the most polluted state in the Union.
I replaced Los Angeles with Houston as the most smog-ridden city in America.
I cut taxes and bankrupted Texas government to the tune of billions in borrowed money.
I set the record for the most executions by any Governor in American history.
I became U.S. President after losing the popular vote by over 500,000 votes with the help of major Enron money and my father’s appointments to the Supreme Court.
Accomplishments as President
I attacked and overtook two countries.
I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury.
I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S. history.
I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.
I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of the U.S. stock market.
My record for environmental issues is the least of my concerns.
I am the first president in U.S. history to enter office with a criminal record.
I set the the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one year period.
After taking-off the entire month of August, I then presided over the worst security failure in U.S. history.
I am supporting development of a “Tactical Bunker Buster” nuke, a WMD.
I am getting our troops killed, under the lie of Sadam’s procurement of Yellow Cake Nuke WMD components, then blaming the lie on our British friends.
I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a U.S. president.
In my first year in office over 2-million Americans lost their jobs and that trend continues every month.
I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.
I appointed more convicted criminals to administration than any president in U.S. history.
I set the record for least amount of press conferences than any president since the advent of television.
I signed more laws and executive orders effectively amending or ignoring the Constitution than any president in history.
I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil industry was revealed.
I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history and refused to use national reserves as past presidents have done.
I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut in duty benefits for active duty troops and their families — in war time.
I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people) shattering the record for protest against any person in the history of mankind.
I’ve dissolved more international treaties than any president in U.S. history.
I’ve made my presidency the most secretive and unaccountable of any in U.S. history.
I’m proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in U.S. history.
My “poorest millionaire,” Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after her.
I am the first president in U.S. history to have almost all 50 states of the Union simultaneously suffer massive financial crisis.
I presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud of any market in any country in history.
I am the first president in U.S. history to order a pre-emptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation, and I did so against the will of the United Nations and the world community.
I created the largest government department bureaucracy in the history of the United States.
I set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more than any president in history.
I am the first president in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights Commission.
I am the first president in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the Elections Monitoring Board.
I removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of congressional oversight than any presidential administration in U.S. history.
I rendered the entire United Nations viewpoints irrelevant.
I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.
I refused to allow inspectors access to U.S. “prisoners of war” (detainees) and thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention.
I am the first president in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. election).
I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for receiving the most corporate campaign donations.
My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of my best friends, (Kenneth Lay, former CEO of Enron Corporation) presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. history. My political party used the Enron private jets and corporate attorneys to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my election decision.
I have spent more money on polls and focus groups than any president in U.S. history.
I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the most resented country in the world, possibly the largest failure of diplomacy in World history.
I am actively working on a policy of “disengagement” creating the most hostile of Israel-Palestine relations in at least 30 years.
I am first president in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security.
I am the first U.S. president in history to have the people of South Korea more threatened by the U.S. than by their immediate neighbor, North Korea.
I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.
I set an all-time record for the number of administration appointees who violated U.S. law by not selling their huge personal investments in corporations bidding for U.S. contracts.
I failed to fulfill my pledge to capture Osama Bin Laden, dead or alive.
I failed to capture the anthrax killer who tried to murder the leaders of our country at the U.S. Capitol Building. Even after 18 months I have no leads and no credible suspects.
In the past 18 months following the World Trade Center attack I have successfully prevented any public investigation into the biggest security failure in the history of the United States.
I removed more freedoms and civil liberties for Americans than any president in U.S. history.
In a little over two years, I created the most divided country in decades, possibly the most divided since the Civil War.
I entered my office with the strongest economy in U.S. history and have turned every single economic category downward — all in less than two years.
Records and References:
I have at least one conviction for drunk driving in Maine. My Texas driving record has been erased and is not available.
I was AWOL from the National Guard.
I refuse to take a drug test or even answer any questions about drug use.
All records of my tenure as Governor of Texas are now in my father’s library, sealed, and unavailable for public view.
All records of SEC investigations into insider trading or bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my Vice-President, attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public review.
Please consider my experience when voting in 2004. ~
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10 Responses to “Best Camping Weekend Ever/George Bush Resume”
September 1st, 2003 at 5:56 pm
Hi there..just wanted to say I found your diary yesterday and am really enjoying reading it…keep up the great job!
September 1st, 2003 at 11:03 pm
what makes you so sure their actions were just for the sake of impressing the guy? And was the guy the same one that had mesmorized you?
September 2nd, 2003 at 12:07 am
I figured after I posted that, that one of you would find it and comment on it.
You know, I respect your opinion that they might not have been trying to impress him, but I’m also entitled to my own opinion. And you know, if it was done in the privacy of their own tent or even on the top of the hill where the kids weren’t walking back and forth, that’s one thing. But out in the open under christmas lights for everyone to see? I was thinking about bringing my 9 year old sister to that campout, and I’m awfully glad I didn’t.
I’m not here to offend anyone, but this is my journal.
September 2nd, 2003 at 4:41 am
Your camping trip sounds rather interesting. I’m going on one myself in a week (well more of a workshop, really, but it’s camp-like) and I really can’t wait!
…did GWB really produce a movie? o_0
September 2nd, 2003 at 4:54 am
Bush producing a Hollywood slasher B movie is the reason I voted for him?
September 2nd, 2003 at 7:31 am
hey, can you share out those emails/ljs? or pass mine around? I wanted to get people’s stuff but they were all gone EARLY monday morning. Terry may come to the Grove this weekend. HOw cool is that? I finally got to see inside the camper and it does rock!
I’m glad i dragged you along if you’re glad you went. *hugs* it was great listening to you.
September 2nd, 2003 at 11:25 am
Playing techno while camping is just…wrong!
September 2nd, 2003 at 11:58 am
Well I enjoyed a lot of the techno music, though I don’t usually listen to it while camping. It’s just it would have been nice to have some time without the techno music for drumming.
September 2nd, 2003 at 3:41 pm
Hi! I was one of the fire dancers - the girl with the short reddish hair.
I hear what you’re saying about the music - I appreciated the Fri night mix, but other than that I can do without. I was leery of the soundsystem showing up, but as our host didn’t mind, I thought “Oh, well.” I actually prefer to spin to drums - when the fire is whirling around you can’t hear anything, but you can feel the beat and it’s a lot of fun. If we’re back for Samhain I think we’ll make sure the electronic element is left behind.
Thanks to everyone for including us - Ding0 and I are both looking forward to coming back.
September 2nd, 2003 at 4:07 pm
Well, the techno music was fine for a while, but just all 3 nights kinda got repetitious.
You guys were wonderful performers and I don’t want you to think that it wasn’t appreciated.