Playing Stepmom
I’m going to be a mother, did you know? Rather, I’m going to be a stepmother. (It sounds so evil…).
The mysterious guy I’ve been seeing, who I purposefully do not talk about much in my journal (since he reads it), has a little girl. I believe she just turned 4 years old, and she’s the most adorable thing.
This particular long distance relationship is very hard, not only from the normal reasons of being lonely, several hundred miles distance, and money for visitations. But because Mr. Right is leaving behind his little girl. Not by choice, but because his ex-wife will be fighting fo full custody, and she’s a good mother, so she most likely will win.
I feel bad for Mr. Right, it’s not easy for me to watch him move far away from his little girl. His ex-wife will be moving far away from where he is now anyway, so he will be an equal distance apart either way, whether he moves up here or not.
But I feel worse because I will also be missing his little girl growing up. I want her to be a part of his life, which means being a part of mine. And in situations like this, it’s inevitable that there will be emotions and energies that, voluntarily or not, will paint us in a bad picture in the little girls eyes. She’s living with her mother, that’s just the way it is. I’ve lived through the situation twice on my own, and a mothers influence is very strong.
I wonder if it’s silly to feel somewhat of a loss knowing that I’m not going to really be able to see his little girl grow up. I hope that she’ll realize when she’s older, that I really do want to give us a chance.
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2 Responses to “Playing Stepmom”
July 24th, 2006 at 11:45 am
I know what you mean. I have a stepson who lives with my boyfriend and I, and the thought of the mother gaining full custody of him again is a scary thought to me. First of all, because she’s abusive and I know she’ll turn him against us, and secondly because I know that she will NEVER let us see him again, no matter what the courts say. She’s evil that way.
I wish you luck with this though. I hope you’ll get to see you stepdaughter more often then you think.
May 15th, 2008 at 5:00 pm
old, but still, congrats